Thursday, December 23, 2010

Hahahahappy Christmas [MUST SEE PHOTOS]


Tuesday, December 21, 2010

It's almost Christmas, so...

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming WOO HOO what a ride!

Author: Maxine

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Hello, has anyone seen my Mojo

I just received this bit of advice from Terry in Singapore - totally spot on and worth posting in its own post I thought. I particularly liked the opening bit of advice about starting out at the same speed that you intend to finish.

Of course my mind is on racing (even if my body and my mojo are temporarily "Absent Without Leave"), I've never heard (or at least processed) this advice before and I like it - in fact I like it a lot. In a Sprint or a Olympic Distance race I red line it all the way so starting the run and finishing at the same speed is a given. On an Ironman however, especially when you start the run you can feel indestructible but after 15-20k have gone by things are usually very different.

I always struggle to pace the run in an Ironman properly and this piece of advice will hopefully stay with me until I get off the bike and start the run in China - all I need to do now is find my Mojo.

On that particular note Terry's advice continues to be spot on and is similar to other comments of advice and support I've had. So I'd just like to say thanks to everyone. It's all greatly appreciated and I'm taking it all on board.

"Hey Simon,

My famous old coach said to me "Start at the same pace that you will finish".

Initially it never sunk in , but eventually became a phrase that I live my athletic life by , or try to anyway.

Granted, IM does require a solid focus-period of high volume training followed by the event and recovery. Often the recovery phase can be too short as we wish to use this new higher base as a plateau to proceed to new levels of fitness. I learnt that the body rarely works this way unless you are able to incorporate 1 or 2 sleep sessions within the day as pro's do.

I too have gone through a recent stage of a total lack of triathlon interest. I did however run a 21km race 9 days ago that I thoroughly enjoyed. Point being, that we can still "compete" or participate at events but perhaps it is wiser to accurately listen to our bodies.

I believe the body will tell us when it is ready to resume our training. Present feelings of lethargy and disinterest are temporary and not a life-change. It is merely the body advising us that it is still recovering.

Personally I think Kona is overrated although I too wish to return one day.
Rest and train for the fun of it and enjoyment until full motivation returns.

Good luck mate :)


Monday, December 13, 2010

What Your Training Partner Won't Tell You

(Courtesy of @rbuike, Susan Lacke and

1. You will not lose momentum if you stop moving during a run. So quit jogging in place at the stoplight. You look like an idiot.

2. There are at least two embarrassing songs on everyone's iPod playlist. There is no need to pretend you don't know how they got there. Just own up to your love for N'Sync.

3. Everyone pees in the pool at some point. Everyone. Anyone who says they haven't is lying. The same goes for the mass start of an open-water swim. There's a reason that water feels so warm.

4. Please limit yourself to no more than two electronic devices when we work out together. Anything more and you have more wires coming out of you than an ICU patient.

5. Newton shoes are the Ed Hardy shirt of running.
6. Outside of your running group, no one really cares if you did a brutal 12-miler this morning. No need to try to work it into every conversation you have at work, at school, while shopping, at the bank…

7. It's kind of annoying when you stretch in inappropriate places, like at the checkout aisle of the grocery store.

8. The first open-water swim any swimmer or triathlete does is scary. Almost everyone panics during their first. It's normal. The real champs are the ones who face it and get back in there for a second.

9. If you're on a Century ride and take a break: Eat first. Reapply chamois cream second. Never, ever, ever the other way around.

10. It's not bragging if you can do it. But until you've done it — zip it.

11. You're not the only one who is self-conscious about heavy breathing when training with another person.

12. Don't wear your aero helmet on a group ride unless you want people to know you're a tool.

13. The same goes for head-to-toe color coordination with your bike.

14. "Chariots of Fire" was good. Not great. We can quit pretending now.

15. To get rid of side stiches, take really deep breaths then exhale fully, like you're trying to squeeze all the air out of your lungs with your diaphragm. Repeat.

16. No matter how fit we are, we still suck in our guts when we first take off our shirts during a workout. First impressions count, y'all.

17. In the pool, please wear appropriate swimwear. We don't care how hot you are; no one needs to see all THAT.

18. Ladies – During hot races, dump the cups of ice from the aid station in your sports bra. Life…changing.

19. You're not the only one who checks themselves out in the mirror while running on the treadmill at the gym.

20. Everyone cringes when they see their race photos online. Do you really look like that when you run? Yes. Yes, you do. Sorry.

21. Don't dish out criticism about someone else's diet/lifestyle/training plan unless you're prepared to take criticism about yours in return.

22. If you're with athletes who know more than you, don't bullshit and pretend you know as much (or worse, more) than them. Just listen.

23. Desitin (yes, the diaper rash cream) works just as well on chafed areas as the expensive post-workout creams sold at sporting goods stores.

24. Unless you were trying to qualify for the Olympics and failed, please refrain from throwing a hissy fit at the finish line if you are unhappy with your performance. You embarrass everyone around you when you do that.

25. There are no expiration dates on PR times. But unless you set a world record or replace it with a new PR, your bragging rights expire after 5 years.

26. There is no good reason to ever, ever, EVER buy anything found in the advertising section of your favorite sport magazines. There's a reason electroshock belts and VO2 breathing trainers aren't featured in the actual articles of the magazine.

27. Even if a training partner is faster than you, don't discount yourself. Chances are very good that person admires something about you: Your positive attitude, your ability to make compression shorts look good, your persistence…whatever it is, keep it up. There's a reason they're still training with you, you badass.

Thursday, December 09, 2010

What the f*** is wrong with you?

(Courtesy of @ncjack)

This is currently doing the rounds amongst the anti-ironman and pro-ironman sets. Very funny and strikes a chord with everyone that has ever known an Ironman or has tried to explain why they are an Ironman. Funny as hell - just too close to the truth.

Very Cool Beer Ad

(Courtesy of Ian)

Bryan Payne please do not watch this for your own health, it is not light beer and therefore you are likely to get dizzy and fall over.

45 lessons life taught me

(Courtesy of Ian)

Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old. This is something we should all read at least once a week!!!!!

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I've ever written.

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Change the way you think.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. Release your children when they become adults, it’s their life now.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye.

16. Take a deep breath It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Just because you believe you are right, doesn't mean you are. Keep an open mind.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. Your job is to love your children, not choose who they should love.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come...

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

A Little Christmas Story

When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.

Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.

Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drunk all the cider and hidden the liquor.

In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor.

He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang, and an irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Not a lot of people know this.

Haha - Merry Christmas

Nativity Play

Sid and Seb just did their nativity plays at school. I was blown away and somewhat nervous to hear that Sebastian was going to be the narrator of the play. His reading skills are about the best in his year so that wasn't the issue but he does get more nervous at times than Sid so I wondered how he'd deal with it.

Sid on the other hand had asked to be one of the wise men bearing gifts. Pretty cool I thought but I was totally wowed by his confidence and singing prowess when it actually came to it. As for Seb, my concerns were totally unfounded he was amazing and boomed out his lines like he was a pro.

Yes I am an overly proud daddy but I ain't making no apologies for that matey! And anyway, when your boys are as gorgeous, smart, intelligent and gifted as mine then you have the right to be (yes I know, I know, in fact I used to roll my eyes at overly proud parents like me but if you are a father or mother then you'll know what it's like and you'll forgive me I'm sure).

Friday, December 03, 2010


(Courtesy of Disco Dave)

A DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher.

He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs."

The rancher says, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there," as he points out the location.

The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me."

Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher.

"See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?"

The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......

With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs.....

"Your badge. Show him your BADGE!"